me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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