Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
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