Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
