Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.

(1-717): View more from Pennsylvania

That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.

Fav 17 4334 829
share tweet
(401): View more from Rhode Island

yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car

Fav 11 1090 3594
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(419): View more from Ohio

Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.

Fav 6 3901 821
share tweet
(985): View more from Louisiana

And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair

Fav 16 6655 1187
share tweet
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Read it at the TFLN blog
(807): View more from Ontario

Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables

Fav 11 5381 1342
share tweet
(715): View more from Wisconsin

We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.

Fav 16 5179 1593
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(636): View more from Missouri

the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"

Fav 11 5916 1222
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(314): View more from Missouri

struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.

Fav 2 648 623
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(239): View more from Florida

We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Fav 0 71 8
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT