Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (424): View more from California

  I'd wear matching sweaters with you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (424): I'd wear matching sweaters with you http://tfl.nu/xbhf
  Replies (3) Good night (2223) Bad night (1212)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis". http://tfl.nu/dn08
  Replies (17) Good night (723) Bad night (6527)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day. http://tfl.nu/8doe
  Replies (17) Good night (7816) Bad night (668)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  To a 70 year old lady?!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face" (774): To a 70 year old lady?! http://tfl.nu/99j2
  Replies (20) Good night (4984) Bad night (2082)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (270): she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah. http://tfl.nu/1uyt
  Replies (30) Good night (9624) Bad night (1205)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations http://tfl.nu/sqlo
  Replies (17) Good night (2301) Bad night (4230)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out. http://tfl.nu/1cqt
  Replies (6) Good night (2376) Bad night (1571)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame http://tfl.nu/q9yu
  Replies (5) Good night (1880) Bad night (547)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though http://tfl.nu/2fqg
  Replies (6) Good night (1154) Bad night (469)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine? http://tfl.nu/l4l5
  Replies (17) Good night (1405) Bad night (764)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes. http://tfl.nu/9eez
  Replies (9) Good night (1771) Bad night (459)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else http://tfl.nu/g6mk
  Replies (9) Good night (1211) Bad night (918)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding http://tfl.nu/2362
  Replies (7) Good night (593) Bad night (1078)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+61): I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night. http://tfl.nu/wtly
  Replies (3) Good night (313) Bad night (545)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence http://tfl.nu/qpf7
  Replies (5) Good night (577) Bad night (268)

Randomize