so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize