Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
