Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.

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  (703): Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii. http://tfl.nu/5g9i
  Replies (2) Good night (1063) Bad night (571)
• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  how was that guy you hooked up with?

  (415): View more from California

  i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing

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  (602): how was that guy you hooked up with? (415): i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing http://tfl.nu/opeh
  Replies (6) Good night (525) Bad night (1410)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  OMG. Drunk.

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.

  (718): View more from New York

  Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.

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  (718): OMG. Drunk. (662): I'm so glad you fill me in on these things. (718): Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter. http://tfl.nu/my1k
  Replies (8) Good night (1131) Bad night (547)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  She went from zero to smokin in five shots

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  (303): She went from zero to smokin in five shots http://tfl.nu/1faz
  Replies (1) Good night (2129) Bad night (787)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher

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  (734): Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher http://tfl.nu/nr2j
  Replies (22) Good night (554) Bad night (2719)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.

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  (504): I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES. http://tfl.nu/2zjv
  Replies (37) Good night (7933) Bad night (1003)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.

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  (954): I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago. http://tfl.nu/vwsn
  Replies (59) Good night (4908) Bad night (696)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.

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  (520): In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties. http://tfl.nu/3p0b
  Replies (32) Good night (7660) Bad night (1101)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.

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  (505): I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat. http://tfl.nu/2tx3
  Replies (14) Good night (3927) Bad night (1286)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.

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  (316): Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night. http://tfl.nu/xbe7
  Replies (7) Good night (2808) Bad night (729)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that

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  (423): and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that http://tfl.nu/i7hu
  Replies (10) Good night (940) Bad night (618)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio

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  (302): Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio http://tfl.nu/5lxt
  Replies (9) Good night (1968) Bad night (499)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?

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  (713): Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink? http://tfl.nu/qwz5
  Replies (10) Good night (1218) Bad night (296)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka

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  (515): Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka http://tfl.nu/yw8u
  Replies (1) Good night (465) Bad night (162)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.

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  (203): I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that. http://tfl.nu/el8i
  Replies (0) Good night (353) Bad night (173)

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