I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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