$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
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