just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
