I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
