I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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