Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
