Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
