So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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