i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
