Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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