And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
