i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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