check it out our google latitudes are spooning
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
