What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I have aggressive nipples.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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