You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
