so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
a search helicopter?!
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
