ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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