I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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