i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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