But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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