Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
