We're like a lot better than the average bears
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
