READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
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