This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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