i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I'm experimenting with sincerity
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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