she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
