But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
