I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
