Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
