they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Randomize
