this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the barista slut.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Randomize