does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
My vagina just recognized that song.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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