He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
