sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
