Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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