I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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