I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
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