How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
