You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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