I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Farmville is her only friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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