I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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