Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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