Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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