Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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