Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
This baby is an asshole
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
