he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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