4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I love you.
Bad choice
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
